Day 31: A Vivid Memory

We've finally reached the final day of the May Blogging Challenge! Hurrah! 
Don't get me wrong; I've enjoyed this challenge. I've enjoyed challenging myself with topics I've not often given a lot of thought to, and I feel I've learnt a little about myself along the way. It's just that this challenge was much more time consuming than I'd originally anticipated, and I feel my regular content has suffered as a result. Hopefully with May behind us, I'll be able to get back on track in June.
So, bringing this challenge to a conclusion, the final topic of the month is 'a vivid memory.' 

I'm thankful to be blessed with a pretty decent memory. I remember a lot from my childhood and from my teen years, but most of my early to mid twenties are quite hazy. I guess my memory has made an agreement never to think of those years ever again. There was little worth mentioning, anyway. I'm not an interesting person.
I'm afraid I don't have any fascinating stories or anecdotes to share with you; none that I think you'd be interested to hear, anyway. I do, however, have a memory about body confidence. 
I remember being self-conscious of my body from a young age. I wasn't a fat kid, but I always believed I was. I was always a tall child, and started developing early, so I felt like my body was different to most of the other girls my age. I was ashamed and embarrassed of myself from an early age. 
I remember being on a school holiday in the New Forest / Dorset area when I was ten (or perhaps I was eleven). We stayed at a beautiful manor house called Avon Tyrrell which was set on acres of land lush in greenery; trees, hedges, and neatly manicured lawns dressed the rear of the property, as did a large lake. My recollection of the estate is of a place which would be the perfect setting for a Jane Austen novel. 

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The Wednesday was a grey day but it was dry, and not too cool as it was the first week of July. I remember this because my birthday was the day before the trip began. We were spending the day on the estate carrying out various sports, and team exercises. Orienteering, archery, kayaking... We were required to wear a t-shirt with shorts, and I vividly remember asking one of the teachers if I could wear trousers instead, as the thought of bearing my legs around all my classmates made me feel sick with dread. The thought of everybody seeing my (not) fat (at all ) legs was terrifying. I distinctly remember my heart pounding and feeling nauseated at the thought.
I don't know if the teacher sensed the reasons behind my hesitation to wear shorts like everybody else, but thankfully, she kindly agreed I could participate in trousers. I was enormously relieved, and had a great time trying my hand at archery, and kayaking on the lake in a pair of blue and white vertical pinstripe hipsters. They were not as cool as they sound... But in the mid nineties they were awesome, and I absolutely loved them.
I haven't thought about that day for a very long time, but even though I remember it as a fun day, it does sadden me that my self-consciousness with my body was apparent at such a young age. It began years earlier, but for some reason, this is one example I can recollect.
Did you have body confidence issues as a child?

Day 30: Letting Go

Day 30: React to this term: 'Letting go.' 

Sitting here in my sister's spare bedroom, burrowing my feet in to the crisp white duvet cover, and hearing nothing but the sound of the whirring of my laptop, I've got to thinking about what the term 'letting go' means to me. At first, I wasn't quite sure if I could answer this prompt, but after some time had passed, I realised I actually have a lot to say.

Over the last twenty months or so since I injured my back, my life has changed dramatically, and so have I. While many would struggle mentally when faced with a life changing injury (whether this be permanent or for the foreseeable future), I have reacted the polar opposite, and found my depression has lifted enormously. I've battled with depression since my teens, and although I can't justify the reason why my current circumstances seems to have pulled me out of the dark abyss which I lived in for over a decade, I have to say it's wonderful to have let go of so much darkness, and the negative weight on my shoulders. I still live with depression, but at the moment it's almost lying dormant, and that's how I hope it will stay.

I guess I've realised how unimportant so many things that plagued me are compared to health, and mobility, freedom, and independence. Without those things, life is so much more challenging. My eyes have opened up to what's really important in life (for me) and what's not worth worrying about. My attitude and opinions towards various things have changed, as has my perspective on myself. My confidence and body-confidence have increased; I'm happier; I'm not exhausted from working so hard... This has all enabled me to let go of the darkness, and negative person I once was, and I'm happy to let go of that.

Of course, there are many things in life I've had to let go of, for now, that I truly miss. With my pain levels unmanaged, and my mobility limited because of this, I can't cope out of bed for more than an hour or two at most- and that's on a good day, so many of my hobbies and interests are on hiatus. I miss going to concerts, travelling, visiting friends, and shopping days, to name a few. I miss being able to do normal tasks for myself without putting myself in more pain, like washing my hair, baking, giving myself a pedicure... but I've learnt to let those restrictions and hurdles go, and have accepted my current situation, and learnt to adapt.

I would almost say I've found a sense of peace over my current situation. I'm at peace with what has happened, and I've been able to let my old life go without much frustration. There's no anger, no blame, no regret, or longing for my old life. Nor am I pining to reach recovery. I've let it go, and I'm concentrating on living each day as it comes and hoping for the day I'm back on my feet again living a more normal, pain free life. I have to let go of the past to be able to welcome the future. Who knows when it may arrive.

Day 29: Five Songs

Can you believe it? I'm finally up to date with the challenge... for the first time in about a fortnight! Thank God this challenge is almost over, and I can go back to posting one post a day on topics which you guys are more interested in reading. 

Today's prompt is: 'Five songs or pieces of music that speak to you or bring back memories. Use Grooveshark or Youtube to include them in the post.'

It's been a long time since I last did a music post, which is crazy as I'm extremely passionate about music. Music is one of my greatest indulgences / pleasures in life, and something I like to listen to every day- and have done since I was about nine years old. I have memories attached to most songs I know, as if they were photographs instead of music and lyrics; a single bar of a tune, or a particular lyric can instantly transport me back to a specific moment in my past. I love that about music.

Having almost 4200 songs in my itunes library, and 703 in my favourites playlist, choosing just five songs to talk about is not going to be easy. In fact, this is a practically impossible assignment! It's like asking me which body parts I'd like to keep. Let's see what I can narrow them down to... The songs, not the body parts. I need all of those.

Fall Out Boy- Coffee's For Closers

'Oh baby, when they made me, they broke the mold!'

I've been a big Fall Out Boy fan since I first heard Sugar We're Going Down back in 2005, and have been playing their albums regularly ever since, and pretty much non-stop since they reunited earlier this year. So I knew I had to include them in this post, but deciding which song to feature was a task and a half as I LOVE almost all of them. I narrowed it down to seven songs... and couldn't choose, so went with the one FOB song I've played most: 'Coffee's For Closers.' It's from the album Folie A Deux, which was so badly received by ''fans'' that they received a huge amount of abuse for it, and ended up taking a break for three years! I personally really love the album, it's filled with amazing tunes, and it's the one I play most! Coffee's For Closers is such an upbeat song, and it makes me feel so blissfully content whenever I listen to it. It's a song I particularly like to play when the sun is shining, so it reminds me of summer from 2009 onwards, but I play it all year round. The also adore and highly recommend: The Shipped Gold Standard, W.A.M.S., She's My Winona, Rat A Tat, You're Crashing But You're No Wave, and Young Volcanoes-  go check them out!

Linkin Park- Iridescent

'When you were standing in the wake of devastation, when you were waiting on the edge of the unknown. And with the cataclysm raining down. Insides crying "save me now", you were there impossibly alone. Do you feel cold and lost in desperation? You build up hope, but failure's all you've known. Remember all the sadness and frustration, and let it go. Let it go.'

I've been a Linkin Park fan since I was fifteen and Hybrid Theory was in the charts, and although I don't have one particular favourite (I have about thirty), Iridescent is one which I've always found inspiring. It's a beautiful song which begins as a soft mellow song about feeling lost and alone, and then morphs in to an almost cleansing uptempo anthem about letting go of those feelings. 'Remember all the sadness and frustration, and let it go. Let it go.' It's one of those songs which has really helped me during difficult times, and one I always play when I'm feeling down. It works like a charm!

Evanescence- Lost in Paradise

'As much as I'd like the past not to exist, it still does. And as much as I'd like to feel like I belong here, I'm just as scared as you.'

Evanescence is another band I've been a fan of since my teen years. I first heard of Evanescence about ten years ago when I was seventeen and carrying out work experience at Twycross Zoo. Bring Me To Life was in the charts and regularly played on the radio as I prepared food for monkeys in the kitchen, and I soon fell in love with the album Fallen. Fast forward ten years to today, and I still love them. I'm particularly infatuated with Lost in Paradise from their self-titled album. I think the song is absolutely beautiful, and the music is so powerful it gives me goosebumps. It really shows off just how beautiful Amy Lee's voice is.

Panic at the Disco- Time to Dance

'Well, she's not bleeding on the ballroom floor just for the attention, cause that's just ridiculously odd.'

Panic! at the Disco have been one of my favourite bands since A Fever You Can't Sweat Out was released in 2005.  (Was it really that long ago??) They're another band whose music I refer to when I need something cheerful and uplifting, as their songs are mostly uptempo and fun. Time to Dance is one of those songs, and one which has been in my summer playlists for years, as it always puts me in a great mood. My younger sister and I used to listen to this song a lot, along with Camisado, if we were together. It reminds me of being on holiday in France lazing about in the sunshine, and also of one particular day out with her to London. I couldn't tell you my favourite Panic! song- I love all of their albums- but this is my favourite summery Panic! song.

Seether Feat. Amy Lee- Broken

'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome, and I don't feel right when you're gone away.'

Broken is one of my all time favourite songs. It was out when I was in college back at the start of the noughties, when I was obsessed with Evanescence's album 'Fallen'. If I'm being honest, I still am today. I was hooked on this song the first time I saw the video. I loved the raw setting, and wanted Amy's black angel wings! It's a gorgeous duet between Seether's Shaun Morgan. and Amy Lee, who were actually dating at the time, and I've always liked how their voices compliment each other even though they're very different. It's a gorgeous alternative love song, and for what ever reason, it's appealed to me since I first heard it, and it's one of those songs I play regularly.

Well, I can safely say I've not even skimmed the surface of my most treasured songs. This post took me a few hours to put together as I could not narrow them down! I love so many songs. I hope you've enjoyed this little taster, and go give a few of these tunes a listen!

 Are any of these songs your favourites?

Wednesday Wish List

Morning guys,

It's that time of the week again when I share some of the pieces I have my eye on. I'm currently feeling a little uninspired with the high street selection online, but there are still a few things calling my name.

1. ASOS Curve Swing Dress with Faded Rainbow £20.00

I love the relaxed shape of this dress, and the cute rainbow motif. It would be a lovely casual dress for summer, and fantastic with denim for a festival.

2. Tatty Devine Dog On Wheels Necklace £25.00

I saw this necklace whilst browsing ASOS yesterday. It was instant love. I adore the whimsical dog charm; it's childish and silly, and exactly my style.

3. River Island Yellow Ditsy Print Turban Head Band £8.00

I bought one of these hair scarves in leopard print yesterday, and it's not only insanely comfortable, but it's the exact thing I've been hunting for for years! Most of this style of hair band on the high street aren't wide enough to create that rockabilly look, but these are perfect. I love this yellow floral print one.

4. ASOS Curve Shirt Dress with Lace Top £40.00

A shirt dress is a wardrobe staple, and I love how this one is a little different with the lace top, and bold jade green colour.

5. George at ASDA Cotton Bolero Cardigan £8.00

A girl can never have too many cardigans in her wardrobe. They give me that extra bit of confidence by hiding my upper arms. I'm loving this rich purple basic one. It's nothing special, but I like it.

6. ASOS Maxi Dress in Egyptian Tribal Print £30.00

I've been admiring this dress for a few weeks now. I think it's such an interesting colour, and it's nice to see a maxi dress that is a little edgier than the usual floral / butterfly print summer dresses. It would look amazing dressed with a black biker jacket, studs, and ankle boots.

7. ASOS Midi Skirt in Digital Floral Print £38.00

Digital prints are everywhere at the moment, and this one is lovely as it's scattered with daisies. This skirt goes up to a size 18, but as it's elasticated, it could potentially fit a few sizes larger.

8. New Look Inspire Broderie Sundress £24.99

I have a soft spot for broderie anglaise detailing, and this sun dress is so pretty. It would be perfect for a holiday in the sun.

9. George at ASDA Crochet Shrug £10.00

Another purple staple cardigan. I adore my Lovedrobe shrugs, and I think this one would be equally cute worn over dresses in the summer.

10. Matalan Falmer Embroidered Dress £25.00

This broderie anglaise dress is another understated beauty that would look effortlessly chic this summer worn with a denim jacket and a pair of gladiator sandals.

11. Swan by Clements Ribeiro Lip Print Shirt Dress £45.00

This new Clements Ribeiro collection has been well received by the plus size blogging community, and there are some really funky pieces this season. I especially love this lip print shirt dress, although it's way out of my budget, and also sold out online. Doesn't hurt to dream, though, does it?

Are any of these pieces on your own wish lists?

Which one is your favourite this week?

P.S. I'll be back a little later with day 29 of the blogging challenge.

Day 28: Only Pictures

The prompt for Day 28 was: 'Only Pictures.'

These are photos of things I've seen, done, bought, or been given during the last week or two, mostly taken at my sister's away from home.

Day 27: A Letter To You

Dear you. Yes, you!

This post is for you, dear reader; whether you're a constant reader, pop by from time to time, or are just passing through. Whether you've ever left me a lovely comment, do so regularly, or prefer to visit silently.

I have a little something I'd like to say. Don't worry, you're not in trouble. I just want to say thank you. A big, sincere thank you for following my blog, reading, commenting, and / or supporting me over the last fourteen months. Thank you for taking the time out of your day to stop by. Thank you for taking the time to comment; I read every single message left for me... even if I do sometimes take a few days to reply. I love to hear your opinions. I appreciate your support and encouragement more than you'll ever know. And I genuinely enjoy blogging with you and for you.

I couldn't have made it this far without you, so thank you so much!

When I started Polka Spots and Freckle Dots last year, I never expected blogging to have such an impact on me. If truth be told, I was sure I would end up neglecting it a couple of weeks down the line, like I did with a couple of Livejournal accounts in the past. I never imagined anybody would actually read my random musings, and although my readership is small, I'm still amazed there are so many people who want to follow my little blog. A modest blog by a boring plus size English girl whose life is a little unconventional to most right now.

This blog has provided me with a purpose and an outlet during an extremely testing time in my life. It's provided me with the tools to keep myself and my mind occupied every day, which, quite frankly, is nothing short of a miracle most of the time. This blog has helped to raise both my self-confidence and body-confidence, and to accept myself for who I am. It's helped me to learn and grow. It's led me to so many of your wonderful blogs, online friendships, and the blogging community, plus size and otherwise. A community full of fabulous, beautiful, and inspiring women of all shapes and sizes.

I have so much to thank you for! So, thank you, once again for supporting my blog, and making it what it is today. For making me who I am today. I could not have done it without you!

Day 26: A Few Things I've Read Online Recently

Sunday's topic was to share 'something you read online. Leave a link and discuss, if you'd like.'

I'm a little late on posting Day 26's topic, as to be perfectly honest, I was stumped over what I could write about. Everything interesting I've read recently, I've either already shared with you through my Serendipity Sunday series; or has already been widely circulated on the news and in the blog-osphere; or were written by yourselves.
So, I put this post aside for a day or so, did a little online reading, and searched through my bookmarks for ideas. Here are a few articles / posts which I hope you'll find interesting.
// Top 50 Beauty Tips By UK Women.
I wouldn't usually feature anything written by The Daily Mail, but I happened up on a beauty post that I found quite interesting and useful. 
While the article delves further in to beauty tips, the article ends with a list of the top 50 beauty tips used by women in the UK, which you can see below. Most of the tips cost next to nothing, and require natural and house hold items. I'm sure most of you will have learnt a few of these from your parents and grandparents, and probably follow many of them today. I know I do!

TOP 50 BEAUTY TIPS BY UK WOMEN

Shave legs with hair conditioner was number eight in women's top beauty tips

1. Cucumber on eyes to freshen them up

2. Drink two litres of bottled water every day

3. Toothpaste on spots

4. Cold damp tea bags on tired eyes

5. Brush talcum powder through hair to freshen it up and stop it looking greasy

6. Sleep in socks filled with moisturiser for soft feet

7. Pinching cheeks to give a natural blush

8. Shave legs with hair conditioner

9. Lemon juice on highlighted hair

10. Drinking plenty of milk 

11. Toothpaste on insect bites to heal

12. Nail polish in fridge to keep fresh

13. Baking soda on teeth to make them whiter

14. Vaseline on eyebrows to neaten

15. Lipstick on cheeks when you run out of blusher

16. Final hair rinse in vinegar for shine

17. Spray hairbrush with perfume

18. Fish pedicures to smooth feet

19. Cold teaspoons applied to eyes to reduce puffiness

20. Using honey as a face mask

21. Super glue broken fingers nails rather than rip them off

22. Steam face in water with fresh herbs added

23. Vaseline to smooth out frizzy hair

24. Heat up eye lash curlers before using them

25. Sleep on back to avoid wrinkles

26. Add sugar to soap to exfoliate

27. Rinse hair with beer

28. Iron long hair to make it flat (before straighteners were invented)

29. Lemon juice to whiten tips of nails

30. Kept eyebrow & eyeliner pencils and lipsticks in the fridge

31. Pouring milk in to the bath or on skin

32. Apply whisked eggs to hair to make it shiny

33. Whitening toothpaste to get rid of fake tan on palms

34. Mix a drop of serum with foundation to make skin glow

35. Massage an ice-cube over your face to reduce wrinkles and acne

36. Use the cold setting on hair dryer to set mascara

37. Sleeping on a silk pillowcase to reduce wrinkles

38. Tomato ketchup on hair to reverse hair dye

39. Pumpkin and coconut oil on your hair to give it a moisture boost

40. Coffee as a body scrub to beat cellulite

41. Mash up avocado and use as a body scrub

42. Having a cold shower to make boobs appear bigger

43. Burst an evening primrose oil capsule and apply to spots to make the them heal

44. Antihistamine to reduce flushed cheeks

45. Rub fresh strawberries in your face to get rid of freckles

46. Using cranberry juice to boost hair shine and enhance colour

47. Adding peppermint oil to lip gloss to enhance pout

48. Brewer's yeast mixed with water to bleach facial hair

49. Soot from a spent match on a make-up brush, for smoky eyes look

50. A spritz of lemonade on damp hair to give hold and texture

And here are a few other posts worth reading.
// Cool Customiser: DIY Nail Polish! An amazing tutorial for making your own nail polish using clear nail polish and eye shadows. I'm so giving this a go!
// How to Pack For A Carry-On Vacation. Space saving tips for travelling with just a carry-on.
// Brit Women Have £1.6 Billion Pounds of Unworn Clothes! Apparently us Brits have 500 million unworn clothes that could stretch from London to New York four and a half times over if placed on a single clothes rail! That's crazy!
// The Militant Baker's awesome letter to Abercrombie & Fitch's CEO Mike Jeffries, in response to his recent revelations is just brilliant. If you haven't read this yet, you should!
// Life in Your Early Twenties Vs. Your Late Twenties. Accurate. Oh, so accurate.

Fragrance Direct Haul / Dainty Doll Blushers Reviews

Hey guys,

I'm sorry for the lack of decent fashion and beauty posts here at the minute. I've been a bit out of action lately, and for that I'm sorry.

I'm also currently staying at my sister's and her company gives me less time to myself to blog, but I'm going to do my best to catch up over the next few days. I'll be staying here for the next ten days until my brother in law returns from a six-month detachment in The Falklands, and after that I'll be booted out and normal service will resume.

Over the last couple of months, I've picked up some lovely good quality make up for next to nothing through Fragrance Direct. Fragrance Direct is a website that sells cut price make up and beauty products, which they are able to do as a result of low overheads. The website appeals to me because it stocks products from big name brands I've always wanted to try- expensive brands- for as little as a mere pound coin... or even less!

I recently bought make up as presents, and ended up adding a few items to the orders for myself. Well, it would have been silly not to at those prices! I also had to keep a couple of products that I knew wouldn't be to my friends' tastes when colours were different than expected. It's a hard life!

So, I bought myself a couple of Sally Hansen nail polishes, a Jemma Kidd eyeliner, and a bunch of Dainty Doll products. I've always wanted to try Dainty Doll make up, as it's designed for pale skinned folk like myself, but I never had... until now. Today, I'm going to give you a peek at the blushers.

I really do like the outer packaging of Dainty Doll products. It has a sleek, sophisticated appearance, and looks like a typical high-end product one might find in a boutique.

I forgot to take a photo of the compact packaging, but they're sleek matte black in colour with the Dainty Doll logo written in gold script on the top. The packaging is slim, light-weight and elegant looking, and made from sturdy plastic. They all have a mirror on the inside, but no applicator.

These three blushers ended up in my make up collection when I realised they were probably too light or too dark for my friends' tastes and skin tones. No hard ship, as I personally like them all. They cost just £1.99 each through Fragrance Direct, but generally retail for £13.50 elsewhere!! They're an absolute bargain!

I have two powder blushers in You Are My Sunshine and Hippy Shake, and one cream blusher in Orange County Girl, and what can I say; they're beautiful!

This is the cream blusher, Orange County Girl, which is simply beautiful. It's a dark coral blush (perhaps with a hint of rose), which has a lovely golden orange shimmer. It may look dark in the compact, but when you apply the (incredibly soft) blusher to the skin, it's very subtle; although, it can be built up to create a more daring look. When I wore it a few days ago, I used it sparingly for a more natural look. The make up felt lovely and silky soft on my skin, and it stayed in place for nine hours without budging before I removed it! I was very impressed with how it handled, and all in all, I adore this blusher! This will be getting a lot of use this summer.

It's sold out on Fragrance Direct now, but it can be found on Amazon here, for just £3.95.

You Are My Sunshine is almost identical in colour to the Orange County Girl blusher, except this one is a powder blush, and the colour looks more intense on the skin. I would describe the colour as a dark fiery coral with a cheerful orange shimmer. It's highly pigmented, silky soft, and long-lasting on the skin, and I personally think this shade would look fantastic on tanned and darker skin tones, as well as the fair skinned folk it's been designed for. It would look stunning on sun kissed skin in the summer! I can't believe I picked up this beautiful make up product for a purse-friendly £1.99! I'd have happily paid full price.

Hippy Shake was a lot paler than I was expecting it to be from the tiny pink square next to the name on the website. It's a very light pink; lighter than it appears in the photo above. I knew this colour wouldn't be suitable for the person I'd bought it for, but being as fair skinned as I am, this colour gives me a subtle glow and hint of colour. It makes me look fresh-faced. It would look great worn with a darker pink blusher as a highlighter, and is perfect for creating soft, feminine, romantic looks. I think this would be a difficult shade for most skin tones to wear except the very fair like myself, although I'm not an expert on the subject! Like the other two blushers, it's a great quality product, that handles like a dream, feels soft, and lasts all day long.

Here are swatches of all three blushers which I took in natural day light, and haven't altered in any way. I'm sure you'll agree, they're all beautiful shades.

You can find Dainty Doll make up on Fragrance Direct here, and there's also many products not available on Fragrance Direct that can be found on Amazon cheaply, too, here. I really recommend this range of blushers, and I say snap them up while they're available so cheaply!

Have you tried Dainty Doll blushers yet?

Day 25: Something Someone Told Me About Myself That I'll Never Forget

Once again, I've been slipping behind with the May blogging challenge. Frustratingly I was all set to catch up last night...  and then the internet connection crashed. Typical. I wrote a few posts down on paper, so I'm going to attempt to make up for lost time now.

So, Saturday's post was supposed to be 'Something someone told you about yourself that you'll never forget. (Good or bad).'

I've been told a great deal about myself over the years, and learnt information about myself I never knew existed. I've been given my fair share of insults, and compliments in my time, and even told a bunch of stuff applied to me that simply wasn't true. However, growing up as a painfully shy girl with low self-esteem, zero confidence, and zero body confidence, anything negative ever said to me always stuck. I always believed the insults and negativity were true, and often allowed them to torment me for years afterwards. When I was about thirteen, I had been suffering with painful aches and pains in the bones in my legs and arms, and was eventually referred to a local hospital for their opinion. I remember going to the appointment with my Dad, and going in to a consultation room where two female medical professionals were waiting. Looking back, I think they were physiotherapists, not Doctors. Separated from my Dad by a curtain, I was asked to undress down to my underwear in front of the two women. I was mortified and extremely self-conscious, and one of the women took one look at me and bluntly told me 'you're a little fat', before continuing to interrogate me about my diet, and lifestyle. I was utterly humiliated, and devastated- and of course, I believed them. They made no effort to be subtle or kind to an impressionable teenager, and instead of investigating my pains, they body shamed. I travelled the whole way home in silence, and in tears, and refused all offers of food for lunch from my Dad. He just didn't know what to say. That one appointment made me hate my body more than I'd previously done, affected my confidence, and made me so ashamed of my appearance. All the thoughts I'd had of myself had been confirmed. I was FAT, I was UGLY, I was WORTHLESS.  This one encounter was largely responsible for almost a decade and a half of self-consciousness and self doubt. I wasted my teens, and half of my twenties hating myself, my body, my appearance, and believing I was a worthless freak. Looking back, I am angered by how these women made me feel. What professional, qualified adult would talk so harshly to an impressionable teenage girl, and knock her confidence while she's at an age when girls struggle with body image and identity? They could have discussed their 'concerns' gently, or taken my Dad aside for a word... No wonder teenagers develop eating disorders, and become obsessed with diets and exercise, and hate their bodies when authority figures make them  believe there's something wrong with how they look. Do you want to know the best part? At the time, I wasn't even fat! I was a five foot five thirteen year old with womanly curves; chubby at best... but oh, did I believe that she was right, and I was FAT. They never did help me get to the bottom of my aches and pains, and blamed growing pains. They offered me a couple of sessions of physiotherapy, but in reality it was just exercise masquerading as treatment. I have to go back to that hospital for physiotherapy and hydrotherapy for my back today, and thankfully, I've not yet been body shamed, but I still hate going there.  I've never forgotten what they said, or how they made me feel... but (almost) fifteen years later I'm finally learning to love and accept who I am.

Sunday Favourites #31

Good morning lovelies,

It's that time of the week again... enjoy!

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I'm really inspired by how unique this tattoo is. It almost looks real.

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This needle-point style tattoo is also a little different; I like the style.

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Love the colour scheme.

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This is so pretty.

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I need this dress!

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This is lovely.

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Love the soft tones in this outfit.

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This braided bun looks so effortlessly pretty.

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This is a great little tutorial for rag curling longer hair. I'll have to try this!

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We may be heading for Summer here in the UK, but these Autumn nails were too cute not to share.

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This is a fantastic idea!

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This /\

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This idea of adding beads to safety pins and turning them in to a bracelet is ingenious. I want to have a go!

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Re-purposed window used as a decoration above the bed.

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Can you imagine if Peacocks were actually these colours?!

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This little daschund is best friends with, and a carer to, this disabled lion. The seven year old daschund has looked after the five year old lion since it was a cub, and even cleans his teeth for him after he's eaten! Best odd-couple ever?

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I want a baby echidna!

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This is a young girl named Tippi Degre who's best friends with African wildlife, including this 28 year old bull elephant named Abu. Click the source; the article is adorable, and amazing.

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Coincidence?

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Don't follow the crowd. Be yourself.

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Rise up and make room for the diversity of beauty.

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Love this.

// I'm sure you've all heard about the recent controversy surrounding Abercrombie & Fitch after the CEO, Mike Jeffries, publicly admitted that they don't cater for larger sizes because he “doesn't want larger people shopping in his store, he wants thin and beautiful people”; but have you read The Militant Baker's brilliant open letter to him in response? 

// This article was enlightening and inspiring: I'm Chronically Ill and I Still Believe in Body Acceptance.

// I came across a couple of great articles regarding chronic pain, which I thought were spot on. Helpful Things to Say to Someone in Chronic Pain and What NOT to Say to Someone in Chronic Pain. 

// 20 Tattoos Inspired by Crafting.

// 25 Life Hacks For Your Tiny Closet.

// 39 People With Water Colour Paintings Tattooed to Their Bodies.

// 50 Incredible Tattoos Inspired By Books.

// 50 Lessons Moomins Can Teach You About Life.

Which part was your favourite this week?